Weekend Warrior

Last Thursday, I was asked to join the station team that would be running up the John Hancock building on Sunday for charity. In a moment of bravado -- or perhaps, stupidity -- I agreed. If you're not familiar with the Hancock Building, it's the second highest structure in Chicago, next to the Sears Tower. 94 floors -- 8,000 feet tall.

As a former track athlete, I think I let my competitive nature get the best of me sometimes. "Sure, I can just knock that thing out, no problem. What's a few stairs?" Ordinarily, it shouldn't be a problem, but see, I've kind of let myself go this winter. You know, it's cold out, working long hours, blah, blah, blah. By Saturday night I still wasn't taking it seriously. I went to L-Boogie's party till about 2 a.m. -- even though I had to be at the Hancock at 7 a.m. -- and incorporated what I'll call my three-pronged W approach to training. Wine, wings and women.

As I looked up at the Hancock at 7 a.m., I knew I was in trouble. I couldn't see the top of the building, because it went into the clouds. On one hand, this may be helpful. If I die on the way up -- a distinct possibility -- my spirit won't have far to go.

I hooked up with our station team, and gleaned some information from some veterans who've done this before. Absolutely DO NOT run starting out, and keep a cough drop in your mouth to provide some cooling sensation when your lungs start hacking out your chest. And take one step at a time. It was good advice. Although I ran the first couple of flights (for the camera's benefit), I settled into a brisk pace. By the 10th floor I was ready to die. At this point it's purely mental. You play games with yourself to get to the next level. About halfway through, I started noticing roadkill -- people who had started before me who fell out on he stairwells. I keep going. Volunteers with pom-poms, yell encouragement at us at each new level. I want to throttle them. Common sense would tell you to stay as close to the inside of the stairwell as possible in order to take the shortest route, but by flight 60 or so, I learn that it makes sense to take it wide when you reach flat ground -- it gives your legs a chance to loosen up a bit.

Flight 84 -- I can smell the finish line, and I told myself I'd pick it up on the last 10 flights. Sweet victory is mine -- not against my competitors, but against my body that wanted to give up.

Today, after months of procrastinating, I finally joined a gym. The older you get, the tougher it gets to fall out of shape and get it going again. My final time was 19 minutes and 3 seconds. Next year I'll get it down to 15.

View this clip on Vimeo

Grillz

Breaking news! Breaking news! As I was flipping around a newspaper today I saw that Nelly's song, "Grillz," had taken over the No. 1 spot in the Billboard 100. More evidence that perhaps:


A) I've definitely moved into another phase of my development where I'm just not in touch with what's considered mainstream cool -- nor can I consider myself an arbiter of such.

B) Memphis and to a lesser extent, Louisville, Ky., could well become the next great cultural centers of America.

C) Pop music is really... really... bad.

D) The fact that I'm railing against popular youth culture proves that I am indeed just like generations before me who fought every new (or borrowed) form of music that came along, from Elvis to the Beatles to hip hop.

But it wasn't the song that struck me as ironic. Mainstream hip hop lost it's ability to shock and bore me a long time ago.

It just so happened that I downloaded a short documentary called "Bling: Consequences and Repercussions," by Kareem Edouard, and watched it on my iPod on my way in to work this week. The documentary focuses on what are referred to as "conflict diamonds" -- the diamonds obtained in African mines under the control of revolutionary regimes. It's the same subject Kanye West addresses in his song "Diamonds of Sierra Leone," and this documentary takes rappers to task for their worship of the tainted jewels. I've never been able to understand that dynamic in Kanye, who brags about his bling as much as any rapper, but at the same time, seems to have a conscious, and certainly, a lot of substance to his lyrics.

At the end of the day, perhaps I just need to get with the program. I'll make my dentist appointment tomorrow.

I Got Jokes

As I've previously blogged, Bode Miller is no friend of mine, and it's been kind of fun watching him flame out at the Games. During today's iCast, I was able to multi-task -- simultaneously take some public shots at Bode (he hurt his ankle in Torino playing basketball), while at the same time, continue my recent fixation with Lolita -- also known as Sasha Cohen. Must be a Russian thing...

Click here to see the clip.

More Ignorant Sh$t

As Dave Chapelle would say.. more skits b%$ch! One of my favorite news bloopers from the archives..

View this clip on Vimeo

What's Wrong Shani?

As I blogged last week, Shani Davis was a name to look out for during these Olympics. You may or may not know or care (judging by the Olympics ratings), but last night the Chicago native became the first black American to win Winter Olympic gold in an individual event by winning the 1,000 meter long track speedskating competition.

What was strange was his attitude after the race. He didn't look like an individual happy to win a gold medal, and was very abrupt and surly during his post-race interview. There's been quite a back story with this kid surrounding the Olympics, involving the politics within the U.S. Speedskating Federation (he trains in Canada), an outspoken mother and his decision not to compete in a relay-type event, therefore incurring the ire of his teammates.

An analyst for our station went so far as to call him a jerk on Friday, which I think is a little harsh with the limited knowledge we have so far. There's more to this story than meets the eye, and I think it will come out by the end of the Games. Unfortunately, my hunch is that race is somehow involved, meaning that America's not-so-secret albatross could again rear its ugly head for the world to see.

Tuesday he's scheduled to square off against American Chad Hedrick, who has developed as Davis' chief rival, and has criticized him publicly for not participating in the team events. Perhaps the networks will finally get the drama and ratings grabber it has been seeking.

The Game: Chick Crack

I've been fascinated by this book called "The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists." Apparently there's dozens of underground groups that claim to have the best theories and techniques for picking up women -- aimed mainly for guys who have trouble doing so. So this writer decided to infiltrate several of the societies, study their tricks and write a book about it.

I literally at times can't put this book down because of the many truisms it entails, and I've turned several of my female friends on to it as well. The players have a theory that no matter what city you're in, or what situation you find yourself in, if there's a group of women present and you follow certain techniques and guidelines, you can exponentially increase your odds of scoring, regardless of your looks or social status. This morning as I was reading the book, I had another "aha" moment.

The PUAs (pickup artists) have a term called chick crack. Chick crack is any psychological or spiritual subject that appeals to most women but does not interest most men, such as astrology, tarot cards and personality tests. I have noticed over the past few years that the vast majority of women I meet seem to have an acute interest in zodiac signs, even if they don't know what they're talking about. "You're a Scorpio? Oh, my!" they'll say with mock horror. When pressed for more information, usually you'll learn that she doesn't really understand the subject on any kind of analytical level at all (except that Scorpios are typically freaks. No comment). But irregardless of her knowledge base, the subject still appeals to her. So guys, think of the advantage you'll have if you're able to turn that around, and give her the astrological detail that she seeks? Ain't nothin' but chick crack y'all...

Geek Alert!

I've become the unofficial consultant for friends considering buying an iPod or another mp3 device, and since every new version seems to have a new wow factor attached, I'm often asked where I think the technology will go. Well, I definitely think it will soon evolve to the point where your iPod is basically a wireless device, and you'll be able to download music without attaching it to a physical computer. Or, beam it a TV and play the video or whatever.

But according to another blogger's post today, the next must-have iPod is a video version with a large 3.5 inch screen and no click wheel. The click wheel appears digitally under the screen when touched with your finger. Now that's cool.

Crash And Burn

So Gina and I exchange a couple of emails Monday morning and I tell her about this little pre-Valentine's Day event at a new bar-restaurant a couple of blocks from my crib. Didn't ask her to go WITH me or anything ... just that I was planning to be there (true), and if she wasn't doing anything, it might be a decent scene. Easy way to kinda sorta ask a woman out without risking rejection I suppose. She told me she had a bunch of stuff to do and was also on deadline, so there was no way she could make it.

Later that night I'm chillin' by the bar and who walks in? Ya, it's her. But she's not making a move to come over toward me, in fact, she hasn't acknowledged that she even knows I'm here. No problem. I watch her work the room a little bit before approaching her as she's talking to a couple of girlfriends.

So you think I got a hug, or a cheerful how you doin'? Or even a smile? Naw... very businesslike. Very... nothing. So after a spirited charm offensive, I excuse myself and move on. She promised to check me before she left, but I had seen enough of her act, and left later without saying goodbye.

This morning I get an apology email saying that she's sorry she didn't see me before I left, but she had a bunch of friends she hadn't seen in ages, blah, blah, blah. In other words, I've been royally blown off.

So the question is... where did I f$#k this one up?

What A Dick

I've wanted to post something on this for a couple of days now, but I guess it's just settling in now. I mean it certainly makes you do a double take when you hear that the vice president shot someone. And not just any vice president, a guy who's been known be kind of a mean s.o.b. anyway, who isn't beyond angrily uttering the f-word in Congress.

Can you imagine if he would've killed that dude? Accidental or not, that's a trippy thing to think about. It was also kind of odd how the story was kind of buried by the time the press finally got ahold of it. Hey, Michelle Kwan's out of the Olympics, let's get our priorities straight...

In our post-modern society, there's always a silver lining to these stories. The jokes! Check out this slideshow I did today on the late night comics' reaction to Cheney's folly.

Some Ignorant Sh$t

I finally got around to cleaning out a folder in my inbox containing all the video clips I've compiled over the years in order to load them onto my iPod. Lots of funny stuff that I completely forgot about, so I'll pass some clips along to you every now and then. This one had to have been one of the most idiotic radio station promotions ever, Hot 97's Smackfest '05. (quicktime file)

Olympic Notes

Woke up this morning to the news that Michelle Kwan has dropped out of the Olympics due to injury. Now the team has to scramble to fly in 17-year-old Emily Hughes to take her place. Seems like reasonable heads could have figured out a couple of weeks ago that this could have taken place. Instead, they give the slot to Kwan for nostalgic reasons, when it was obvious she wasn't ready, and hadn't earned her place on the team this year. Now some kid's got to compete after coming in last-minute, not to mention she's already missed the pomp and circumstance of the Opening Ceremonies. Oh well. Perhaps that will open up a slot for a Canadian athlete to sneak in for a medal. Oh yea biznitches, you know who I'm rooting for, what now?

In other news, Bode Miller, arguably the most outspoken and annoying participant in the Olympics, finished fourth today, out of the medals. Looks good on you now kid. Win a gold medal, and you can yap all you want. Now you're just some guy with a ski pole with a big mouth.

Keep an eye out for my man Shani Davis, Chi-town stand up! The Hyde Park (South Side Chicago) native has also generated his fair share of controversy, mainly due to his outspoken mother, but hopefully this kid -- who seems genuinely nice -- can pick up a gold.

Working Hard Or Working It?

As I promised earlier this week in The Russian blog entry, I planned to pursue a podcast interview with Gina B., the relationship expert for Red Eye newspaper. She came in this afternoon and we rapped about the pressures surrounding Valentine's Day. She's mad cool, and as I mentioned earlier this week -- mad sexy. She does, however, seem to be slightly jaded by the male species, a result of constantly listening to other females' relationship problems through the course of her job. We agreed to discuss it over drinks. Stay tuned.

Anyway, click here to listen to the interview. By the way, Motorola has just signed on as our podcast sponsor, hence the ad at the beginning. Gotta make that money money!

Discuss: Working Hard Or Working It?

Another Riley In Da House

I'm proud to announce that my nephew, William Riley, came into the world at about noon today. Eight pounds and 12 ounces to parents Ray and Tracy -- and no pressure on me to produce a boy. Pictures coming shortly.

Sexual Healing

If I've learned one thing about running a Web site, it's that a good headline will draw readers in. After all, you are reading this right now, aren't you? Well get your mind out of the gutter.

Interesting piece of news in the entertainment world today. Jesse Martin, of Law and Order has been tapped to play Marvin Gaye in a planned movie that will focus on the latter years of his life. It's called "Sexual Healing," and it chronicles Gaye's self-imposed exile in Europe after years of battling drugs, domestic issues and label headaches with Motown. It's supposed to begin production this summer, but no word on an expected release date. I could never figure out why my mother used to get upset when I walked around the house singing that song as a kid...

So what other dead musicians haven't received the proper movie treatment? I'm waiting on Jimi Hendrix (Terrence Howard) and Miles Davis (Don Cheadle).

Goodbye Katie?

I have to be careful with this one... but rumors persist that Katie Couric will bounce this summer from the Today Show and take over the Dan Rather's vacated post at the CBS Evening News. This isn't new, but the interesting scuttlebut surrounds her possible replacemnent. Word has it that Meredith Viera of "The View" is under consideration, as well as ... hold your breath now ... Kelly Ripa. My advice? Keep looking.

Cruci-Fixins

It turns out that the leak about Britney Spears' guest appearance on Will and Grace was untrue. Spears was supposedly going to play the host of her own food show called 'Cruci-Fixins.' My NBC email account has been inundated with complaints from the various Christian coalitions over the issue, but NBC issued a news release saying the storyline is not accurate.

This is the second such email blast from the Christian folks in the past couple of months, the first in regards to a since-canceled NBC show called the Book of Daniel. The funny thing is, after the complaints came in, I ended up watching the Book of Daniel because I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I guess that's what I don't understand when groups make a big deal out of these issues -- don't you call more attention to it than it ever would have received in the first place?

The Russian

She's a bartender at one of the bars inside the building I work in, so I see The Russian a couple of times a week. She's tall, attractive, and the accent -- well, I'm sure you get the picture. My boy swears The Russian has a thing for me, as every other drink is usually free, and she constantly pleads with me to stick around for another.

Here's the catch. She's a server. It's her job to make her customer feel welcome. The more I stick around and drink, the more she's likely to make in tips. Is it any different than dealing with a stripper, or even a prostitute? Of course she's going to flirt, it's a financial transaction!

Every Friday, I always make it a point to pick up the Red Eye, an alternative daily newspaper here in Chicago. Gina B -- who happens to be mad sexy herself -- writes a relationship column called The G-Spot, and actually wrote about the flirtatious server conundrum in her latest column. I think it's time she came in for a podcast interview, just in time for Valentine's Day. Stay tuned.

Discuss: Flirtatious Servers

Discuss: Is Gatsby using his job as an excuse to meet women?

Apple Unveils $149 Nano

At this rate, it'll be a matter of months before we'll all be able to have sex with our iPods. Apple announced a new Nano today, a 1 GB model at $149. At this price, Apple continues to put a stranglehold on the entire MP3 music market, and it pretty much eliminates the need for its low-end Shuffle. 1 GB of space will hold about 240 songs, so if that sounds like all the music you'll ever need (doubtful), this is definitely a good price point to get in the game. Personally, the Nano looks a little too flimsy for my liking, but to each their own.

Line of the Day

Fashion designer Kenneth Cole came through the building a couple of months ago touting his new AIDS campaign. (Podcast Interview) The commercials and magazine ads include a bunch of celebrities with the slogan, "We All Have AIDS." So anyway, he dropped off a bunch of t-shirts with the slogan emblazoned on the front. One of my co-workers decided to wear the shirt today, making her the target of much derision, as that's not exactly what's considered proper work attire. The best line came from another co-worker. "You don't see anyone walking around with 'We All Have Genital Herpes' t-shirts."

Best line #2, from the archives, as this happened about a month ago around Christmas. A co-worker was walking around handing our gifts and saying Happy Hannakuh. When she got over to our area, she handed us the trinkets and turned to me and said, "I have some Kwanzaa stuff in the back if you're interested!"

Discuss: Inappropriate work clothing; Your own line of the day

Super Droll

The Game

I guess I can eat crow for publicly picking the Seahawks to win Sunday. Blame the refs or whatever, bottom line is they didn't get it done. Gotta feel good for The Bus though, that was nice to see even if the media went overboard on that storyline during the lead up.

The Commercials

The commercials didn't really do it for me either. I think the expectations for the S.B. commercials are so high these days, that the advertisers try too hard and overreach. The Burger King commercials were a perfect example. If BK would have saved, say the commercial with the King running a bootleg on the field, that would have went over big. But the dancing girls acting as toppings on a Whopper didn't generate much reaction among the crowd I was with. I still have to check the rest online, but I did like the Hummer commercial with the two giants who had the baby Hummer. LostRemote.com posted interesting three-word reviews of Super Bowl ads.

The Hang

Those who complained about hosting a Super Bowl in a cold-weather city received their validation. Detroit was windy, snowy, cold and not conducive to hanging out and taking in all of the festivities, although that didn't stop a lot of folks. Cover charges were outrageous at most spots. The Diddy party on Friday night was $300 a pop, and ended early because it got too crowded. A buddy of mine who was there told me he had an "alright" time. An "alright" time for a $300 cover charge? Diddy better be serving me drinks at that price.

Detroit

It was kind of sad to see all of the Detroit bashing leading up to the game, although I've certainly done my share in the past. It was interesting to see the tone of the local news after it was all over. It had kind of a "Thank God we didn't screw it up" ring to it. Where's your self-esteem Detroit? Everybody now: "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!"

Super Bowl Predictions

I'm out the door, headed to Detroit for the Super Bowl. Well, not actually for the game, but for the hang. Here's my game prediction, along with a preview of some of the Super Bowl commercials.


View this clip on Vimeo

Cya Monday.

Chapelle On Oprah

Speaking of doing other stuff while you're supposed to be working, I was so busy today that I couldn't watch Oprah. Not that I usually watch Oprah -- cuz I don't -- but she had Dave Chapelle on the show today in his first real interview since going awol. What good is TIVO if you don't use it?

Anyway, I caught the gist of what happened. As first put out there by his friend Aaron McGruder of Boondocks fame (another blog for another time), Chapelle was apparently uncomfortable with the caucasion reaction to the racial subject matter of his work. Essentially he felt that they weren't necessarily laughing at the deeper meaning of the joke, just at the caricatures he was putting forth. If that's the case, he gets mad props, because that's a hell of a $50 million stand to take.

I have one of his Comedy Central DVDs, and like to listen to the segments with he and another writer's commentary in the background. When they were talking about the famous skit in which he played Clayton Bigsby, the blind guy who was in the Ku Klux Klan and didn't realize he was actually black, he spoke about an experience with a buddy of his who he previewed the show for. His friend did all of the art for the classic Def Jam albums, like the plane on Licensed To Ill, so he's a pretty sharp brother. Anyway, dude's reaction to the skit was that Chapelle would set back black progress about 10 years with that skit, so that's pretty indicative of the type of pressure Chappelle was getting, just among his own peeps. I thought it was pretty funny.

Regardless, I think he still had the forum and the opportunity to do his own thing without quitting the show altogether. If the old methods made him uncomfortable, there's a lot of different ways to go about being funny, edgy and thought-provoking without flushing it all down the toilet. Sure ... easier said than done.

Discuss: Chapelle, political correctness, black social pressure

Bad Girls

There's no question that bad boys have a certain appeal for a lot of women. I'd like to think that by the time a woman leaves college and gets some real world experience, they begin to wise up, but my memories of college involved me playing the nice guy role -- and getting limited play -- and the dudes that you could guarantee were going to fool around on their girl, pass on an STD or physically or mentally abuse her, still managing to pull 'em by the boatload.

But what about the bad girl syndrome? I must admit, despite myself, there is a certain allure to the bad girl. Not necessarily something I'd act on per se, but alluring nonetheless. Currently, I'm fascinated by Kendra Davis, wife of NBA player Antonio Davis, and famous for getting into an altercation in the stands during a Bulls game. Thursday she was arrested in a Chicago suburb for getting into an alleged road rage incident in which she threw a cup of hot coffee at another woman. Davis claims the woman used a racial slur. (View Slideshow)

I don't know Ms. Davis personally, nor do I know what happened in either incident, but it's safe to say that there's probably some anger management issues there. So what's the allure of a bad girl? I'm still trying to figure it out. Certainly there's nothing attractive about being with a woman who probably wouldn't think twice about slashing your tires if she thought it was warranted, or, even worse, slashing your bits and pieces if she thought you had cheated. But one thing you can say about your bad girl -- you know she's always got your back.

Got a project chick, that plays her part

And if it goes down y'all that's my heart

Baby girl so thorough she been with me from the start

Hid my drugs from the NARCs, hid my guns by the parts

-- Girls, Jay Z

Discuss: Bad Girls and Bad Boys

The Jokes On ... You?

I'm sure somebody has already done this, but if not, somebody should write a guide to email etiquette. It should be a must-read for anyone who chooses to communicate electronically.

There's nothing worse than the person who finally decided to step into the 21st Century and get an email account, and thinks it's cool to forward every joke that comes across their inbox to all their friends. Or every bogus warning urging you to pass it along to five of your friends or risk years of bad luck, or, even better earn a $50,000 check from Microsoft if you send it to 20 friends. Do people really believe this stuff? Then there's the chronic emailers who haven't figured out the Bcc.. feature. No, it's not cool to send a useless email to 200 of your closest friends and further annoy me by making my email public to the whole group. It's even uncooler when someone hits Reply All in response.

If you're wondering what sparked my little email rant, the public relations manager for the Golden State Warriors was fired Wednesday for inadvertently sending out a racially insensitive e-mail titled "Ghetto Prom" to the team's entire media distribution list. Obviously, homeboy should have been working, but like many of us who are probably guilty of doing the same thing at some time or another, he slipped up.

I've had friends fired for similar things -- good people whose jobs were flushed down the toilet for an honest mistake. There's an old adage that we use in the TV business that is probably applicable here. Even if you don't think you're on-air, never say anything with a microphone on that you wouldn't want the audience to hear.

By the way, ByronCrawford.com, a site that calls itself the only hip-hop blog on the Internet, has pictures of the Ghetto Prom.

One more quick rant on the chronic emailers. I hate those guys who email a bunch of people every time they get a cool job, promotion, award or start some stupid blog. Glad I don't know anyone like that.

Discuss: Email Etiquette

Video Test

I'm trying to figure out what the video looks like in this piece, so here's an sample of my daily Web exclusive segment on www.nbc5.com that we call Hot Web Picks. This was actually the first one I did.


View this clip on Vimeo

Here Goes -- Hopefully Something?

Now keep in mind that I'm an artist... and I'm sensitive about my shit. -- Erykah Badu


Thanks for checking out my blog people. I've been talking about doing this for awhile, so it's about time I actually stopped talking, and actually did something about it. I'm not sure how this thing will evolve, but I'll take it day by day... or, perhaps day by every other day, depending on my schedule. Ya.. let's do this.